The Revenge of WIP Wednesday
30 Dec
So I was happily barreling along, assuming I didn’t need to write anything. I just finished a massive novel! I have a few shorts in edits, and a few cooking! Sure, Meghan got me back the awesome edits on The Resurrectionists with head-spinning alacrity– but hey, I need at least another two or three months of distance before I can be trusted to properly tear it down and build it back up. I couldn’t possibly write anything just now!
And then I started writing another book.
I have no idea how this happens, but I like it, so I don’t care. Seems like a good way to ring in the New Year, right? Especially since I only wrote one novel last year, which is an unheard-of amount of slackage from me. Unacceptable!
Anyhow, I’m doing a weird fantasy/clockpunk hybrid thing called The Company of St. Rage about a company of mercenaries who are hired by a hapless, way too young king. There are vague prophecies, magic that’s really just madness, and possibly the end of the world involved.
Yeah, I don’t know either. I’ve learned not to argue with the voices.
But since it’s Wednesday, here’s a little something. Ilidh Bannon, mercenary captain, and two of her lieutenants, Elanzah and Cami, discussing their new client. It all begins with Cami declaring:
“King Osgar Fearghan III is a cock.”
“I don’t know, I think I like him.” This from Elan, who was all innocence, kicking his feet in the air like a bored child. “So he looked at your rack. Gods, Cam, I look at your rack. It’s amazing.”
She spun on him. “I was talking about his people dying right and left of dysentery, and he was staring at my tits.”
Elan’s pretty little lips quivered.
Cami saw red. “Jealous?”
Elan laughed.
She was about to punch him in the neck, but Ilidh’s grunt caught her attention. “Would you two shut the hell up and help me? Felix strapped me in wrong, that bastard–”
Cami immediately attended to her captain’s too-tight straps. But she couldn’t resist one last, “I knew you had a hard on for the King.”
“I’d fuck him, but–”
“Who wouldn’t you fuck?”
“That’s just my point. See, you’re weakening your own argument–”
“Oh, fuck you, Elanzah–”
But Ilidh interrupted with, “I swear by all the Fearghan frozen hells, I will kill you both if you don’t stop. And no one’s fucking the King– not unless he’s paying for that, too. And if he is, you’d better get top dollar. Understood?”
One last cruel look between them, and Elan and Cami answered in unison, defeated: “Understood.”
I chose that bit because, as you can see, it illustrates why all my first drafts have to be edited extensively for overuse of the f-word. You’d think with all the crap I read, I’d have a way better vocabulary, really.
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Now playing: The Verve – Stormy Clouds
via FoxyTunes
Ha, that’s hilarious…you’ve got me hooked already. I saw nothing wrong with the dialogue but some may (like the guy who complained about the most recent flash on 52 Stitches).
I assume, then, it’s not for the YA market?
I’m convinced I don’t eff things up enough. Heh.
I have a hard time making my characters curse believably in my work. I have no problem in real life. I need to work on that.
Alan, I think those people would see something wrong with me personally too, so I don’t mind. Ha! Of course, I WILL edit a lot of that out, just thought it illustrated that particular point well
Aaron, good writers don’t need it. It’s a crutch! (Just, I actually talk like that.)
Jamie, yeah, I definitely do it because I do it in real life, but I know what you mean– they’re two different things. The way I swear isn’t particularly believable, is the thing. Who says “cockbag” five times a day? Honestly.
Now, now, let’s not be rash. There’s nothing wrong with a good fuck.
They’re mercenaries. No one’s going to think they’re believable unless every third word is “fuck”.
=P
Real people swear…
On another note, congrats on starting another book.
Nat, too true. Words of wisdom, in fact– and no, I’m not being ironic. But you knew that.
Megh, you know, that’s an excellent excuse. I love it!
Cate, thanks, I’m really excited about it. Didn’t see it coming on so soon, but glad it has.
And they do swear– that’s about how our everyday conversations go around the house. But then, I’d be watching A Clockwork Orange when I was in high school, and my dad would come out and yell “Nice movie, Kate!” if he heard the f-word. So you know, it balances out in my mind